Lessons from a happy person

I like to go on about how much I love life, how much I enjoy my life and generally how one should live an abundant life. It’s no secret, fam; that’s why Jesus came for real.

"I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." - Jesus 

I’m not about to miss out on that free gift. And I’m not about to let you go on living like an abundant life costs money.  Let your life be radiant. I could give you a thousand tips on how you can do that, and I will definitely give you more tips on this blog as time goes (so yeah, stick around maybe, yes?)

Here’s just about eleven things that happy people already know...

(Yes, eleven, coz ten is too normal)

1.   Reduce your wants

Wanting material things can be motivating yes, but it can also be quite depressive. This is my logic: the more you want, the more you lack; basically because you never get exactly what you want, therefore you keep wanting, then getting some, then wanting some more, then getting some, then wanting more again – a constant vicious cycle of lack.

The more you lack, the more discontented and dissatisfied you will be. And guess what, the more discontented you are, the unhappier you are. Simple.

2.   Don't take things personally

Like, just don't. You will gain a great amount of freedom that way. Some people, really, are just clueless when it comes to handling other people’s emotions. Most people lack emotional intelligence, so they will say pretty hurtful things, or just be outright inconsiderate. Don’t take it personal. The problem lies with them, not you. Especially if somebody doesn't know you personally and they say things that may pretty much hurt your feelings, it will just be kinda dumb to take what they say personally, because simply put; they don’t know what they’re talking about.

3. Don't compare your life to other people's lives

Cyber stalking has been proven to actually depress some people. I remember one time after I had graduated. I didn’t have a job for a good solid seven months or so, and had no prospects of pursuing further studies in Law, or anything like that. I was kinda just bumming around at home, trying to keep my cool. It became quite unbearable to go on Facebook. Most of my fellow graduates were posting pictures and stories about how being a legal candidate is so cool, or what cases they’re dealing with at the law firms, or how studying for their extra studies is keeping them busy. They really seemed like they had it all together, and they seemed all purposeful and stuff, while I, on the other hand, just felt like I had no goals, and therefore, no life. Yes, I’m exaggerating a little, but you get my point.

The truth is; most people have definitely got it better at certain things than you do. But the thing is; there's other stuff you've got going for you that they don't, (but that kinda stuff never makes it onto social networks!) What we see when we compare our lives with others’ is merely a reflection of what is missing in our own lives. Your life is great, just the way it is. But it begins to suck when you compare your behind the scenes with other people’s highlight reels. Don’t do that to yourself.

4.  Love yourself and your decisions

Many people won't approve of you, your decisions or your way of life, but the great thing is; you don’t need other people’s approval. When you're confident about your ways, it really doesn't matter whether other people support you or not, because you happen to be your own biggest cheerleader. It makes your life so much simpler if you don’t have to worry about what Tom, Dick or Harry will have to think about where you’re at in life. 

Seeking people's validation is suicidal. 

5. Appreciate

Everybody absolutely always has something (or some things) to be thankful for. Identify your thankful'ables and appreciate them. This is the only instance I allow myself to compare my life to other people’s lives. (Hypocrite much?) Let me even rephrase; this is the only instance I allow myself to compare my life to other people’s misery and I think to myself “Wow, I’m actually doing pretty damn well.” I count my blessings, I realize how fortunate I am, because, despite the fact that I may be broke or going through a heartbreak, at least I have a couple of rich friends who can take me out for ice-cream so I can get over my issues, right? Some people don’t have rich friends J. Some people don’t have friends at all, you know. 

6. Be f.R.e.E.

Be free to be who you are, whichever you you choose to be on any particular day. Be free to make your own decisions, knowing that you'll own whatever consequences come with those choices. Be free to appear silly or stupid, in the confidence that you’re definitely not stupid. Be free to wear what you want and to do what you want. Just wear that freedom badge, basically. Unapologetically, lovingly and with all due respect.

7.   Eat well

Yeah, of course I had to throw this one in there. I’m not much of a healthy-food freak, but I am a foodie (I absolutely wholeheartedly love and appreciate food; till menopause do us part or something), but I am quite conscious about not eating stupid food. You really are what you eat, so if you live off junk, guess what you are? *hides* Some foods make you momentarily happy (i.e. the heavenly chocolate) but they leave long-lasting toxins in your body that are anti-joy.

8.  Take care of your body

Like seriously; it’s the only one you’ve got. Not only does exercising every now and then give you a sense of self-discipline and pride, it helps you live healthier. It also makes you look totally cool on Instagram when you post pictures of yourself at the gym or in those Nike trainers – (not that that matters of course, hihi)

It is true what they say that “The only difference between a healthy person and an unhealthy person, is that the former dies healthier”, but it is also true, that the healthier people are happier coz they don’t have long medical bills when they hit the age of 40. Besides, we can all really do without gasping for breath after a few minutes on the stairs when the lift is broken. *takes own advice*

9. Understand and accept this: crap happens...

Like, all the time! People die, accidents happen, money runs out, hearts get broken, thieves take their jobs seriously, people hurt people, cellphone screens crack, sickness creeps up on people, nails break, life disappoints, things go wrong almost every second of every hour. Sometimes it happens to other people, and sometimes to you.  I’m not saying you should expect poop to drop on you all the time, I’m telling you not to be so shocked when it does happen. BE mentally PREPARED, rather, because one way or the other; you will find yourself at the bottom of some pit if not just for a few hours. Being naïve about hell breaking loose won't help you deal when it does break loose. Coz it will. I don’t mean to deliver prophesies of doom, but I repeat; bad things will happen to you. How severely hell breaks loose on you depends entirely on your attitude. Always remember that.

10. Don't worry

Hear me on this one; the things you're tempted to worry about right now won't matter that much this time next year. Try to remember what you were extremely worried about last year. Either you don’t remember, or that stuff seems really insignificant at the moment. And also, half the things we worry about do not even ever happen. So just take it easy. 

Be (+)ve. 

11. Faith, Hope & Love

There is absolutely no way on earth I can tell you how to live an amazing life and not give credit where it’s really due. It is not because I’m extremely smart and talented (Yes, I kinda really am) that I live a full and abundant life. Jesus has got much-much to do with it. I cannot imagine how one can live this life without a strong and unwavering source of hope. Jesus is my hope, my strength, my ultimate joy; the one in whom I have faith and find love. All the ten steps above may fail you, they definitely fail me sometimes. But take this one step; the Jesus step, and see how abundance of life just comes naturally. I kid you not. 

Always remember what Mallory Hopkins taught us...